Everybody is talking about quarantine life, but nobody seems to be talking about life as an essential worker. There are videos of people thanking them or being thanked by them. I’ve seen pictures showing the hard work and dedication of essential workers. What about behind the scenes? What’s really going on in their lives and what are they really feeling?
I cannot speak for every essential worker, but I can speak for myself. In this post I’m going share with you what life as been like for me as an essential worker.
A whole new world.
I was told a couple of times that because I am an essential worker my life was going to basically stay the same. No, just no. Yes my schedule did stay the same. I work the same hours and still get my normal days off, but every time I show up to work there is something new. A new protocol, new rule, new signs or some new thing set up to protect us. An everyday reminder that life as changed.
We have plexiglas shields at almost every counter. All employees must wear a mask when on the sales floor or in the pharmacy. There are social distancing signs EVERYWHERE! The walls, doors, floors and the counters. The shelves are empty and more drugs then ever are on back order.
The worse part of all this is the emotions. The entire feel of my store has changed. Very few people are coming in happy. Most people are scared or angry or both. I find myself spending a lot more time soothing my patients and addressing their concerns. I’ve also been yelled at few times over the lack of merchandise coming in.
There is a huge contrast between work and home. At home I become one of the quarantined, and like most of the quarantined, I only leave house if it’s absolutely necessary. While at home, I can distract myself from whats going on and things don’t seem so bad.
At work, however, it’s right in your face. I don’t get escape it for eight hours. I’m around customers, patients and employees who only want to talk about covid. I know eight hours seem like nothing to a lot of other essential workers, but for me it started to have an effect.
Pandemic Panic Attack!
At the end of March it hit, I woke up at 3 am shivering cold and my throat was scratchy. I freaked out! I thought this it, I have Covid! Half asleep I flung myself out of bed, grabbed every thermometer I owned and started checking my temperature. It was a whopping….97.5.
Even though I had no fever and knew deep down this wasn’t Covid , I couldn’t calm down. My mind raced with everyone I had been in contact with. I was more afraid of all the people I could have infected then I was about having Covid.
In case you’re wondering, I have allergies that cause my scratchy throat and I was shivering cold because it was 50 degrees in my room.
One day at a time.
That episode brought on a few sleepless nights, but after taking sometime for myself and talking with others I am doing okay. I realized that just because I am an essential worker does not mean I have to be okay with what’s going on. I can be calm and collected at work and breakdown when I get home. It’s okay. Sometimes you just need to get it out.
The Lord reminded me that even Jesus broke down. Check out Luke 22:42-44 and Matthew 26:39. He was afraid of his impending death. In some translations it says He fell prostrate before God and prayed that the Lord would take this cup from Him and that he was in anguish.
And he went a little beyond them and fell on his face and prayed, saying,”My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; yet not as I will, but as You will” Matthew 26:39
I am taking things day by day now. Everything is still different and will be for a while, but I have faith that we will all get through this.
No matter what essential job your doing right now, I thank you. I am so grateful an appreciative of all your hard work and dedication. We are forever in your debt!
If your struggling please don’t be afraid to reach out for help. If want to reach me you can leave a comment here, email me at : firstname.lastname@example.org or find me on my Facebook page: fb.me/mtfaithblog78 .
Love and Blessings,